Uglacy Returns, Chapter 1, Go Gervitz!

Meet Angel Uglacy.  She is a true Uglacy, a 12th generation, grand daughter of Don the Zombie and Samara Uglacy.  She is a family sim (ugh), super nice with 10 nice points (ugh again), and a Pisces with 5 neat points, 2 outgoing, 5 active, and 3 playful.  Serious, shy, and nice.  Plus pretty.  She is the black sheep of her family, but she is also my founder.  If you never read my stories back in the day, I wrote the Uglacy.  It was somewhat famous as legacy stories go, but more then that, it was written in the golden days of siming.  If you want to read it, go here http://stl.dreamerstoday.com/Uglacy/  .  Also it might be a good idea to read my prologue, which explains my legacy madness more in detail.  Now on with the show.

“Listen Angel, I don’t want to mislead you.  Legacy living is not for the weak of heart.  It involves a lawn and very little money.  The founder has it the roughest.  In addition, I suck at it.  You should know that right up front.   So Angel before we get started, I wanted to explain the rules a little. A legacy is 10 generations that can earn points for various things. On top of that, there can be no cheating. EVER. No boolprop, mods, spawning the happy baby, no crap like that.”

“OH, I would never cheat. Cheaters are nasty pumpkin eaters!”

Gage: “Great. Wait till she’s living on a lawn popping out babies.”

Plus I may add some handicaps like free roaming ghosts, storyteller, the well dressed sim, and fearless…”

“OH can I do the impossible wants, like 10 babies!”

“UM, no. NO, no, no.”

OH, I’m so excited. I can’t wait to get started!”

“Woah, kid, you’re scaring me. I’m not use to enthusiasm.  You’re an actual descendant of a legacy family, so college is an option for you.  Sim State it is.”

“Grandma Samara, I’m going to college, just like you did when you meant Grandpa Don!  Maybe I will meet the love of life there too!”

“Yea, those were good times, except when I accidentally killed him with the cowplant at the Secret Society, and brought him back as a zombie.  Oh who am I kidding, that was a good time too.”

“So Gage Jr., I have a little favor to ask of you.  Remember how I sent you to college before and never graduated you.”

“Yea, and now I’m back to being a teen with limited romance interactions!  Thanks a lot for nothing.”

“Yea, well, how about I make that up to you and I send you to college with Angel.  You can kind of keep an eye on her.”

“Wow, yes… that would be awesome!  Campus ladies watch out, the big man on campus is back!”

“Well this is it baby, Sim State…  I can’t believe you were chosen to bring this legacy back to life.”

“It’s what I want daddy.”

“Just remember Angel, boys are nasty creatures who only want one thing.”

“Daddy, Gage Jr. is here to watch over me.”

“Yeah, not making me feel any better at all.”

Oh Caferteria man, how I have missed you.  Faithfully serving up your mac and cheese.

I feel like I’m home… *sob*

“So Gage, we have to work on money.  As legacy university kids, our goal will be to build a fraternity house by our junior year that future Uglacy kids can attend.”

“Cuz, relax, I got lots of way to make money.”  O__O

“Hello, would you like to make out with my cousin for five dollars?”

“Uhh…”

“Gee cuz, thanks for pimping me out and all, but can you reign it in a little.”

Angel absolutely loves dancing, but she dances like I play the sims.

“Hey girl, are you okay, are you having a seizure.  Should I call the paramedics?”

I think Gage Jr. was trying to help her, but this picture is rather disturbing.  That’s pretty close for cousins.  They are actually cousins in their family tree.  Thank God, or this could get really creepy… creepier.  Whatever.

“So my Grandpa Don makes the best chili ever.  He owns the Chili Cafe in Strangetown.”

“Your mother sucks *%$@& in Hell.”

“Wh..what?”

“Kaylynn, what have we told you about demonic possession in the cafeteria.”

“Captain Howdy doesn’t like your macaroni and cheese… old man.”

Angel is after my own heart and immediately rolls the want to major in literature, taking the storytelling handicap seriously.   I am so proud *sob*.

Gage Jr. rolls the want to major in Art, which sounds like him, probably wants to paint nudes.

How nice, sweet sims attend college…

“These term papers are so hard.  Okay, okay, the history of the Simonian Empire… Focus.  I got to make an A!”

How not so sweet sims attend college…

“Write your term paper for you?  Of course Gage!  I’ll get right on that.”

How nice, sweet sims attend college…

“I have to get all my assignments in, even if that means staying up till 2 in the cafeteria and missing all those great college parties.  But academics are everything!”

How not so sweet sims attend college…

Gage Jr. has been staying up till 2 too, but for different reasons.

“Everyone’s heard about you and that professor!  You should be ashamed.”

“Hey, a romance sim has to do what a romance sim has to do.  And who are you to judge, the pancake police?”

“Hey guys, whatcha doing? Want to see me dance? I’m getting good at this.”

“No Angel, that’s okay. Gagey J. is kind of busy right now.”

“Shake it good baby, shake it good… let’s all dance together. We can do the Macarana!”

“Cuz, can you go away, really, you’re killing my mojo right now.”

“Finally, baby, alone at last. Come here Whitney! Give me some loving.”

“Oh Gage, tee hee.”

Whitney Hourvitz is a Whore Witch, ha ha. Sorry, that was too easy… like her…

“What are you doing Gage Jr.? Are you busy?

This seriously happened… haha. Family sims absolutely the most annoying.

“Cousin, seriously?! Whitney and I need some alone time.”

“Sure, sure, I understand. I’ll just hang out over here and dance. Don’t mind me.”

The next morning at breakfast:  Angel  proves she has a big mouth.

“So did you slip Whitney the tongue, Gage. That was some major kissing.”

“Cuz, give it a rest. TMI!  Can you cool it.”

And as if that wasn’t bad enough…

“Hey everyone, Gage had his first woohoo last night with Whitney!”

I think I actually see Gage Jr.’s eye twitching in this picture.

I was tired of Angels creepy obsession with Gage Jr.’s love life, so I decided she needed one of her own.

Meet Phil Barakat. He’s ugly and he’s secret society. This is my kind of sim!

“Hi Phil. I’m glad you could come over.”

Sweet little Angel. What did I say she had, oh yes, 2 outgoing, so shy.  Family sim, salt of the earth this one.

“So do you like tender kissing, smooching, kissing up the arm, making out, I mean what kind of action are we talking here?”

Seriously her first conversation with Phil face to face. Gads, frickin, frackin shy, my flip flops she is! Family Sims.  Sexual deviants in disguise.

“So can I move into the secret society?  I heard you guys have all kinds of ugly guys.”

“Erm, well yes.  Most of them are actually ugly now that I think about it.”

“WOOhoo,ladies, look at my blurred goodies, you know you want to!”

3 Secret Society Friends and the world is ours! Slap on the social glasses and do a school cheer! How I have missed these crazy interactions. Gooo Gervitz… or maybe it Gerbits, or Gerbils… I donno. But I love it.

“Wow, I barely know that girl, and yet I feel so connected. Like I could tell her about being gay when no one knows.”

This is Christopher Cwik. I actually had no idea he was gay till later when I could see his wants. He kept refusing girls and rolling wants for Gage Jr. My sim gaydar is apparently wacked.  He did become one of Angel’s besties though.

“Gorvit to the right, Gorvit to the left, GOOO Govitttt!”

Glasses + School Cheer = quick, shallow friendships.  The power of the glasses cannot be denied!

“So my cousin has been dating Phil Barakat. He’s one of those freaky secret society kids that think they are a secret when their goofy jackets obviously give it away. I want to make sure he’s an okay guy, Whitney. You know, um, not like me.”

OH my gosh, Phil is dreamy. I’d totally do him.”

Thank Whitney, for your whore witch input. Something tells me she is a romance sim.

“So Phil, I wanted to put my first flirt out there and charm you. Are you charmed?”

Why is Whitney WhoreWitch’s ass in this picture? Why is she lurking? Skank.

“Oh Phil. I think we should go out for our first date. Somewhere nice, like Oresha’s Family Dining.”

Er, I don’t think the date is going to be a dream date… yeah, this actually happened to me. Because my sim playing really is that atrocious. They were on a date. I see this guy and I’m like oh crap.   Is she up to 3 friends already? Oops.

“What’s your problem mister? Can’t a girl date around here?”

“Nope, you’re fraternizing with a top clearance secret society member. We can’t have that. You have to come with me immediately.”

“Uh, my eyes are up here.”

“Yea, yea, sorry, it’s just us secret society boys don’t get much action. Are those what boobies look like. *drool…”

“Well so much for a dream date! Thanks a lot.”

Sorry. Didn’t realize you had that many dork friends yet.

“It’s okay sweetheart. We can just keep our date going on here, in the glow of the deadly cow plant.”

“Oh Phil. How unromantic of you.”

And there was a problem. No attraction. No bolts. I know I should just be shallow and focused on his ugliness’ but I want my little family sim to be happy. Just a bolt or two. This is sad and pathetic.

“Hey baby, what’s a hot zombie like you doing in a place like this. Quinton see, Quinton like!”

And just like that, Angel meant her two bolt Komei lookalike love of her life. The attraction was instant. Sparks were flying.  Meet Quinton… uh, Jihoon, Kaboon.. Tarantino! Yes, that’s it. Okay, I don’t remember his last name, sue me.

“So my Uncle Komei always said, dur, girls are pretty.”

“OH my, that’s so sweet. Your uncle was distantly related to me. Many, many generations ago. In a legacy far, far away.”

I realized quickly that Quinton is stupid. But they have a two bolt attraction and that’s cute. Plus I’m lazy at building relationships.

Uncomfortable is sitting in the secret society drinking coffee while your recently found heart throb is talking with the guy you were just on a date with about movies, or curtains, or whatever the hell that bubble is.

Ahh, the secret society, where the perks never end and the fun begins. I always, always get my Uglacy kids accepted. It’s a family tradition! Other then a few cow plant mishaps, it’s a great college experience. It was, after all, where Don the zombie was originally born… died… resurrected. Whatever.

Angel was on top of the world, and then she meant… Heather Huffington.  Heather is a top member of the Tri-Var Sorority. She romances Castor Nova under the nose of her good friend Tiffany.  She is a snob, a slob, and a sleeze. And she did not like Angel, who she obviously thought was beneath her own high standards.

Meanwhile, Gage Jr. was on the brink of failing his sophomore semester, so I forced him to study with Angel.

“WOW, this is what a book looks like. Where is the centerfold?”

Yet another one of Angel’s wants, a wormrat. So I cave. Meet Panda.  Let’s see how long poor Panda survives.

Angel needs some aspiration fodder since she keeps rolling weird wants like selling a masterpiece when she has 3 creativity points. So anyhows, we call Quinton over for a date, and tried to ignore the tramp in the background dancing in her underwear throughout the date. Angel was heart farting the whole time.  Also notice the whore witch back there stalking.

Seriously, tramp in your underwear, back off. You are not going to win Quinton from Angel.

An Uglacy always gets their man.

Or girls as the case may be…

“Hmmm, I heard this secret society has some hot chicks in blazers. It’ my kind of place, complete with handcuffs and nerd girls.”

Secret Society has it’s perks, but I had forgotten what pigs these people are. Does my sim look like your personal maid people? These kids need a class in cleaning! Angel may be nice but she is sick of cleaning up your dirty dishes. On top of it they eat like pigs and have a “magical” refrigerator that never needs stocking.

Gage, on the other hand, fits right in. “Gulp, gulp, snort, munch, slurp, gulp…”

“Oh Quinton! What a dream date, pillow fighting for hours on end!”

Precious, clean cut Angel. Rolls wants to date Quinton and then just wants to pillow fight. Such a nice girl. So wholesome, so pure… so unlike any sim I have ever played. Uglacies are usually mean and are hell on free will. I avoid their want panels. Especially the ones named Gage.

“Let’s hold hands, Quinton.”

Is that it Angel… is that all on your want panel. Sure you don’t want something more?

“I want to do a term paper.”

*Bangs head on computer*  What is this? Little house on the prairie?!

Who rolls a want to date and go to the library. That’s just depressing. Good thing Quinten is dumber than a box of rocks or he would have lost interest a long time ago.

“Oh Quinton… I think I rolled another want.”

Gads, if its to play red hands, I’m finding another founder.

Hallelulah…Hallelulah….Hallelulah! It only took 4 dates, but whose counting?

Of course it is only for a kiss at this point, but I’ll take it. Angel has to have the aura of being hard to get. Family sims have their standards, low as they may be.

So I decided this couple needed a real date, not Angel’s pathetic attempts, and took this couple downtown to the Botanical restaurant. I missed the Sims 2 downtown so much. Absolutely the most fun ever, well actually it got disturbing when I once downloaded a mod bed for free will woohoo and made a hotel, but that’s a story for another day. Tell me you haven’t missed this fellow sim players. Recently, I heard Sims 4 is going to have a restaurant expansion…. really? Hate to tell you EA, but *cough, cough, rip off! Let us toast your repackaging and reselling of this expansion. “To EA, the money making gurus of recycled ideas.”

Sadly, Angel doesn’t have much money, but like the poor college student they are, she and Quinton shared cake. Let them have cake, I say.  Ahh, the restaurant interactions, eating each others’ food and blowing kisses. Sure beats rabbit holes any day.

I know what you’re thinking, but you would be wrong. Angel just wanted a picture.

Doesn’t Quinton’s face say it all, or maybe he’s just trying to remember how to tie his shoes or breathe. Who knows.

Sadly, Angel, wants to be BFF’s with Heather Huffington for who the hell knows why reasons. Ever since she met her in the gym, Angel won’t let it go. But I try to make my little sims happy, and it really pisses me off when they get snubbed by townies or even worse pre-made CAS sims in pink striped pants. What? Are you Marsha from the Brady Bunch? The Seventies called, and they want their clothes back.

“Oh, aren’t you cute for a stinky, ugly zombie. Wanting to be my friend, as if…”

“I would invite you to pledge into the Tri Var, but we have standards, and I doubt you would pass our rigorous vision exam. I hear Zombies can’t see, why with their eyeballs falling out and all.”

Lama: “GO Heather, you’re so awesome! Tell that zombie loser girl to get lost!”

“Now run along, we don’t allow legacy trash around here. And don’t stink up our sidewalk on the way out.”

“Now hold on just a second, sister. No one insults my cousin like that. I hate to tell you that you’re the one with vision problems if you picked that outfit. You’re just pissed cause you will never make our legacy with those good looks.  You’re doomed to spend your pathetic life swooning over Castor Nova, living in a pink house in your pink clothes, and never getting out of college.”

“OH my goodness, how rude, how boorish… how manly. No man has talked to me like that, and yet I feel this magnetic pull I cannot explain…”

Random Cheerleader: “GO Gagey, Go Gagey,   You’re so awesome!”

“I know I should be repelled by you, but I am but a moth to a flame. We should go out, but not in public. I have a certain reputation to uphold.”

“Yea, I’m sure you have a reputation alright. I would turn you down if I had standards, but I don’t, so I won’t. “

Two romance sims. They were supposed to fight for this story line, not flirt. *Sigh* when am I ever going to learn and turn off free will?

“Grandpa Don. I rolled a want to visit with a relative!”

“Wow, Angel, that so nice, and so unlike an Uglacy. I notice Gage Jr. isn’t calling me.”

“Oh grandpa, you really don’t want to see his want panel. It involves Heather Huffington.”

“Grandpa Don, I really, really want to join the Tri-Var Sorority house, but they hate me. Heather Huffington hates me. She says I’m a stinky zombie. I don’t know how to be popular. Maybe if you taught me how to make chili.”

“Well first, you would need a few more cooking points, but honey, Heather isn’t worthy of the Uglacy chili if she can’t see how special you are. That chili had a religion based on it. I think you should forget that plan, and make your own Greek house.”

And thus, the Uglacy Greek House was born. I didn’t actually go for the 5X5 lot cause that’s just humogous for a greek house and is guaranteed to glitch by generation 3. We took the 4X4 route, and between Angel’s good grades and harvesting money trees, she and Gage Jr. had about 7 grand. This is what we could build. Who would not want to pledge to this house, complete with an aspirational love tub…to lure unsuspecting victims in. There were no cheats in the making of our greek house… well not technically…

You see, boys and girls, money trees are not cheating. They are aspirational fodder for the taking. But they don’t yield that much money. And it takes a lot of water, and all your guests like to steal the money. So what is a poor little Greek house to do?

“Hey Gage, have you seen the counterfeiting machine? We’re missing one.”

“Nope, nope, haven’t seen it.”

“Hey, did you hear that someone took the counterfeiting machine from the Secret Society?”

“No, really, you don’t say? Why that’s a real shame. What kind of low life would steal from the Secret Society?”

Speaking of stealing, Professor Jerk here kept coming by every night harvesting our money trees. We couldn’t get him to leave, so I thought, hey, I’ll have him jump in the hot tub with Angel to pull him away from the trees.  Just to befriend him and build up her grades.

But… (and this would only happen to me), Angel gets hit by lightning, not the jerk professor of course.  I get her out of the tub pronto to run her into the house… not wanting anything to happen to my precious founder…When what to my wandering eye should occur?!!!

Who says lightning can’t hit twice. WAAAAAH!  Great, fricking great! My founder is dead. Seriously?! At this point, what are my options?

• Cheat, pretend this never happened, don’t save, and never speak of it again.
• Go to the Secret Society and resurrect her on the ten dollars she and Gage Jr. have. Then she’ll be a real zombie, incapable of heirs. UGGGGGGGH!
• Or depend on Gage Jr. to save the day and convince the grimster to move along.

Option A sounds the best… *sigh*. Okay Gage Jr. it is.All my hopes and dreams fell on Gage Jr. Oh good grief. Beg Gage Jr. Beg like it’s Heather Huffington.

“Oh please, please Mr. Reaper, don’t take Angel. If you take her I’ll be stuck in college again for forever. Plus she’s actually nice, she’s never even woohoo’d! It would be pathetic if she died.”

No pressure, Gage Jr., but you better pick the right hand or this legacy is over. The future of the Uglacies is on your shoulders. Please don’t let me down. Did I say how sorry I was about those college years and leaving in the sim bin for years? OH geesh, I got to look away. I can’t watch. I have to watch. I could still exit without saving if he screws up. No one would know, I could delete the last few slides…

“Would you SHUT UP! I have a plan. Inny, minny miney mo…”

“YES, I shoot and score. In your face Grimmy!”

Gage, shush, don’t push it!  Thank him politely and point out his handsome cloak.

“Oh gosh, Gage Jr., thank you for saving me! I thought everything was doomed!”

Whew, so did I. Why do these things always happen to me? Is it Karma for stealing the counterfeit machine from the Secret Society? Hey, they had two.  Ironically, I sent Gage Jr. with Angel to “protect” her as a joke and he actually does save her life.

“Well that sucked. ”

Upgrade time. We have fancy windows! Woot! Woot!  Of course the stripper photo bombed this.

“Hi Heather!”

*silence*

Well someone is stinky, and it’s not Angel. Way to ignore her, Heather. B@$t&ch!

“Did you hear about that lame new Greek House that weird zombie girl started. I hear no one is joining, and they have some stalker professor hanging out on the lawn. No wonder they are only a level one, haha!”

“Totally sitting right here, Heather.”

Not that this guy was paying attention any way. Typical Secret Society loser.

“Oh my gosh, boobs!”

“That’s it Heather, I was nice to you. I wanted to be your best friend forever! Well you want a Greek House war?!  You got one. And the Uglacies may not know much, but we know how to party! Bring it on!”

Step 1: Before any party, make sure your home is clean and tidy! Influence one of the annoying mascots or cheerleaders to do the dirty work for you.

 

Step 2: Invite a variety of friends and participate in an array of interesting and tantalizing conversation.

Step 3: Randomly make out with a few of the guests to up the party rating. We just went to “Not Bad”. Have books available so nerds like Christopher can read novels at their leisure.

Step 4: Invite Heather Huffington to the party, and use her like a roll of cheap toilet paper to get that rating to Roof Raiser! Treat my sims like crap and you pay a price…Well I don’t know about everyone else, but I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.“Heather? What are you doing here? Why are you in a bikini?”

“Just reading a novel, zombie girl. Nothing to see here.”

“So you got a roof raiser and two pledges. It’s going to take a whole lot more than that to beat Tri-Var.”

Shut up Heather and do your walk of shame home. I won’t tell everyone that Gage Jr. got you to pledge just for the fun of it and to make you clean our toilets. Oops, I just did. Oh well.

I don’t know which is more disturbing. Watching Gage Jr. Woohoo Heather Huffington,or watching him play with Panda the wormrat. It’s a close call. Maybe I should have a poll.

Winter is coming… no really it is. Gagey get some clothes on and stay away from the OCD coach.  We don’t need to be begging for another life.

Seriously, what part of winter is coming are you guys not getting? This is not bikini weather. On a side note, isn’t that bright red plumbob pretty?   You don’t see plumbobs like that in every legacy. Rudolph has nothing on us. It’s a gift really, a natural talent at sim playing. I look at all the pretty platinum plumbobs on other people’s legacies and think, what the hell? Do they cheat?!

The college years would not be complete with at least one Toga Party! Toga, Toga, Toga! Okay, does anyone notice Gage Jr. in this picture. What in boolprop is he describing? Ugh. No PG 13 here.

Apparently she bought it, and she pledged in, and it upped our party score.  Go Gagey J!

Get ready for some “As the Sims Turn…drama”

So somebody’s boyfriend was none to happy. By the way, that’s Phil, Angels first crush that didn’t go anywhere. Phil needs some serious anger management. First, he attacks Robin Cho… she’s the ugly girl getting slapped, in case you didn’t know.

Then he goes smacking Angel around!

“Chill Phil, we just had a crush, we never even kissed! I’ve been with Quinton for two semesters now!”

And Quinton, and Mr. Read a book completely ignore the whole situation. Nice, guys. Way to stick up for a girl.  He’s a domestic violent offender.  Plus this creep is ruining our party score!

“What a jerk, I can’t believe I ever liked that guy. And I can’t believe what a wimp my boyfriend is for not defending me!”

Well Angel, just wait. You see, Karma has a way, especially with the Uglacies.

Phil decided that next he was going to open a can of whoop ass up on Gagey J. And so they fought for literally an hour. Now this wrecked the party score of course, but the entertainment was great. Pop the popcorn, baby, cause this is better than pay for view. Well kind of. Not really. But it is free!

“I ain’t some girl you can slap around bitch. Next time you try to open a can of whoop ass, try bringing a can opener.”

Gagey is not one to mess with. He doesn’t have much in the way of skill points, except body. Much to Phil’s dismay.  Stupid Phil goes on to try to beat Gage up 2 more times.  Yea, it ended the same each time.

“Waaah, I got my butt kick.”

Oh suck it up buttercup. Maybe you shouldn’t be slapping girls around. Fortunately, Phil here is already pledged to our Greek House because he totally hates Angel and Gage now.

Speaking of Angel…

“Quinton, I finally got the want to do something more than pillow fight.”

“Oh?   OHHHHHHH.”

Look at that face, not the brightest crayon in the box.

Angel’s final party was her graduation party. She even invited grandpa Don, but the picture was ruined by everyone heart farting over Robin Cho. Seriously guys? She’s not all that and a bag of chips too.  Look at that haircut, it could take someone’s eye out.

DON! Not you too. You better not let Samara see that thought bubble!

“Durrr, this assignment is so hard!”

Psssk, Quinton. You graduated. You don’t have to do assignments anymore!

The Uglacy Greek House, now a level 5, which beats Tri-Var (at a 3).  If I was a good sim player it would be 10, sigh.  That ship has sailed.  It has Christopher Cwik, Robin Cho, Phil Barakat, and Aurora Woodrow (all from the secret society) there to keep it running for the next generation of Uglacies.

And so the time had come for Angel to go off into the world and start this legacy up. But before we go, one more picture for your viewing enjoyment.

Hey, Heather, I think you missed a spot! Well that’s it for now folks! It’s been great playing the sims 2, and if you are getting an itch to play it again, let me give you a hint. EA now has The Sims 2 Ultimate Collection on Origin that you can get for FREE. It’s the original game PLUS all the expansions. Yea, yea, I Know the internet says it happened in July 2014… but here’s what you do. You go to Origin, go to chat help, you give the sob story that you had the original game, and that you missed out on the free game. They will ask you for the cd code of either your game or any expansion. If you give them that, you can download the free game. I read it in a forum, tried it, and it worked! I didn’t even have all the expansions, so Bonanza!!! Take advantage of the free giveaway, and then join us at http://www.boolprop.net!  You can still post sims 2 stories there. Don’t settle for cheap imitations… ok they aren’t cheap. Play the classic! Happy Simming!